Living Abroad I thought was the answer
For a long time, I really thought I could bypass all my issues with living in the states this way.
Preface
I was born abroad to a father with American citizenship, so that doesn’t me an immigrant. My father was a refugee from Europe to America. I think in many ways he was just grateful to finally have a “home”. However there has been so so many things he had to give up in order to assimilate and live in this new home.
From the beginning
So that’s why I start like this… In no way have I lived off the system, or should be the poor relation that America has taken in. My family gave back. They gave back a lot. We are overachievers. Any country would be proud of having refugees taken in and becoming productive, intellectual and dare I say tax paying citizens.
The problem with America for me is…
I have told you I was born a citizen. That my father contributed greatly to society. That we were never a burden to the welfare system. Yet I was reminded as a child every day of my life how I just didn’t fit in. I was told what I could do so other Americans (ones that weren’t as productive) could be comfortable in their presence.
Dissatisfaction
After awhile that wears you down. It makes you think that you are the weird one. Sadly you start thinking you will never be American enough. In my case, I started realizing that I didn’t want to be that person so I could be accepted.
What culture?
Sadly not sure what happened along the way. Our culture has become more infused with childish selfishness that I was taught my entire life not to be. The biggest problem I see is that for some deluded thinking guns and violence have become the go to solutions in society already ridden with crime and distrust.
And it’s spreading fast
So my next step is really thinking how can I affect things. I lived outside the country for ages. Since Obama leaving the presidential office, what I see in terms of culture and rationalism has gone. America doesn’t represent me. She has never really wanted me. So what to do?
My choice
Perhaps the only thing that would make others wake up is to leave our American citizenship. In other words, no longer pay tax to America! Maybe that way they finally want me as an American.