Style from my Korean Mother
Growing up in the 80’s, my mom shopped at a boutique called “My Movie Star Daughter”. That woman has never ever said No to extra anything.
Bling, the more the better!
Ribbons, hello? you need bows!!
And of course ruffles, PINK please!!!
Now I see a lot of that vision in Korean kids designers and this is exactly what my mom dreamed of come to life. She just loves the pretty.
And as she has become a grandmother, she still has the same aesthetic… My mom has the Vara Ferragamo Bow flats in every colour (and metal) combination possible, but of course her favourite is still the pastel pink! Can’t take that Korean girl out of the grandma!
My mom’s #girlsquad
If you’re Korean you will understand, but my mom’s clique is and has always been at church. Now these ladies don’t got nothing on Regina George #meangirls. Many of these friendships are lasting decades, and long time grievances are never forgotten but old school friendships #squadgoals are different.
These days a friend who talks only about themselves and ropes you in to make all the Gim Bap (it’s like korean maki rolls) for church fellowship would be deemed a narcissist. It’s ok, you can cut her out of your life. However in my mom’s group of friends (cough cough Mean Girls?) that’s all normal and more commonly shrugged off as “high strung”.
So basically the soundtrack to my childhood has been my mother complaining to be about so-so’s mother (fyi once you have kids this becomes your name, eg. Hi! I’m Orly’s mom). One Sunday afternoon I remember saying I liked one of her friend’s outfit at church. My mom’s reaction was a purse of the lips then she said “that woman shops too much at Anne Taylor”.
Kmart meets Chanel
What’s wrong with Anne Taylor? Well nothing (it’s American High Street brand that is very safe and classic like Boden? but not as colorful or quirky) but I still remember the next words out of her mouth. First let’s set the scene, while speaking to me my mom is wearing St. John’s Knit black cardigan with ruffle trim, matching knit palazzo pants, and silver tank top.
When I look at my mom, I always have one flashback… it’s move in day for freshman at Parson’s Design in the city (NYC!) and my brother’s gay fashion major roommate tells my mother he just loves St. John! He says so cheerily “it’s like Kmart meets Chanel”. My mom just hears CHANEL so big smiles from her!
Finally the wise words from a korean mother (now grandmother)
So back to my story, there are people out there who care what other people think of them. They wear clothing to fit in. They also don’t have the confidence to shop at discount retailers and mix with different brands. My mom’s motto is does it make you happy (perhaps she’s the excessive Marie Kondo)? Although you may think my mom’s style is tacky (I don’t! I love ruffles and bling bling too!) and many people may not like it, but what matters is she loves it. This is all personal preference, but she’s right boring and safe is forgettable.
Obviously please don’t apply this advice to a corporate setting, although you had to see the Ally McBeal type suits (I can just hear in my mind “how else you going to find a good rich husband”) my mom bought for me when I graduated university. See to her nothing is worse than no style, even bad style. No style means you never went up to bat, that you are too scared to show people who you really are… That you allow other people to control what you want to really wear! No one can control my mom, this is 100% true.
MiniEmbassy Style
So that’s MiniEmbassy Style, don’t be scared to try anything (ok, wait, wait, wait, don’t go showing too much skin at inappropriate places) because not trying is worse than trying.
In regards to spending money on fashion and brands, I can also leave my mom at the local TJ Maxx store for hours. She will buy me a Michael by Michael Kors dress from a discount store and be like “it was $39.99!”. The look on her face at that moment is pure ecstasy.
But her usual strategy (for adults) is to buy good quality (especially accessories) for long term key pieces of her wardrobe. For instance her St. John collection some pieces can be traced to 1990, now it’s vintage! She’s a visionary!
Just always remember, it doesn’t matter how much money you spent as long as you enjoy wearing it.
